Choose Happiness – Practice Forgiveness

by Linda Chaccour

Some people chase happiness, others choose happiness. The sole purpose of life is to be happy, to enjoy life and to get to a place where you are not hoping to get to another. If we look at our inner utmost desires, we could see that all our dreams are not so different. We all share ONE common goal: “Happiness” for self and for the people we love.  Not long ago the pursuit of happiness was a personal quest, now happiness has become popular and a matter of national importance in some countries.  I really believe that choosing happiness is the only way for everyone to move forward and to make positive changes in life whether on the personal or the professional level.

What does choosing happiness really mean? And how do we really do it?

Extensive scientific studies in the fields of positive psychology and neuroscience conducted in the past decades reveal that happiness is an attainable skill that can be cultivated by integrating positive habits and practices that could bring more bliss into our lives and the lives of those around us. We all have the opportunity to make ourselves happier by the way we think, approach our lives, the habits we cultivate and the actions we choose to take.

Constantly, we make conscious choices and various decisions in our lives so why not making a conscious decision to be happy every day of the year? Our happiness level only rises when we stop chasing happiness and start choosing happiness. Therefore, every morning on waking up, set an intention to be happy, to make the best of your day and to enjoy every moment no matter what, simply because choice is really powerful.

Happy people choose to be happy regardless of their external circumstances and have rituals. What kind of rituals would you like to introduce to your life in 2019 to make yourself happier? Identify and introduce one new ritual at a time and make sure it becomes a positive habit before introducing a new one.

A good ritual that can help you increase happiness is forgiveness.

There is no end to what the power of forgiveness can do. Whether you need to forgive others, or you need to forgive yourself, the spiritual process of forgiveness sets you free from the past and enables you to fulfill your true potential. Forgiveness will clear the bitterness away and stop your suffering.

Yes, suffering! Because if you want to be happy and travel light in the midst of this life, you need to let go of past hurdles, any anger and resentment you have towards your own self or towards any other soul, you need to forgive and make peace.

Ask yourself: “What if everything that happened to me in life really did happen for a reason? What if any challenge I am facing and any pain I am feeling is there to serve me in the long run?  What if life was always happening for me and not to me?”  Your answers will help you find a higher meaning to your past hurdles, failure, a meaning that can support your growth and evolution into a better human being. Try it!

So how does one learn to forgive especially when the pain was and is still strong?

Follow the steps below to start your healing process:

  • Think about the person or the situation you need/want to forgive.
  • Acknowledge your feelings, thoughts, and attitude towards that particular situation or person. Just be genuine and honest. Then, express your desire to heal, forgive and let go of anger, resentment, disappointment, etc.
  • Remind yourself of the benefits of forgiveness and its spiritual powers in general and then think about the positive impact it will have on you or others if you chose to let it go.
  • Remember a past time when you found forgiveness in your heart, how did you do it, and why?
  • Put yourself in a state of gratitude, in a complete state of thankfulness to the gift of life that you have, the forgiving process becomes easier when you are in that state. Note that you cannot be in two different states at the same time – if you are in gratitude state you cannot be in fear or pain state at the same time.
  • Cultivate genuine compassion for those who have wronged you. Deepen your understanding that people sometimes they hurt others because they feel insecure, unappreciated, fearful, starving for love or lacking certainty. 
  • Think about a role model, consider the great masters of forgiveness like Nelson Mandala, Mother Theresa, or the Dalai Lama, read their stories, and get inspired.
  • Remember a time when you were forgiven.

Most people think that the act of forgiveness is the hardest and most impossible thing to do. Today I tell you, change your perception, and your feelings and attitude will follow. Forgiveness gives you great power, makes you stronger over past mistakes and helps you move on.

“A healed memory is not a deleted memory Instead, forgiving what we cannot forget creates a new way to remember.” – Lewis Smedes

Forgiveness is the key to happiness. Let go and just be amazed by what you see through the eyes of grace.

Ralph Marston said “Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy. No person will make you happy unless you decide to be happy. Your happiness will not come to you. It can only come from you.” And he is totally right.

Keep choosing happiness and happiness will keep choosing you back!

To your happiness!

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